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Writer's pictureDeanna Loveland

Another Lesson in Trusting God


They said the hardest part would be when they wheeled him away from me, down the hall to surgery. Sure, that wasn’t the easiest thing but I think the hardest part was waiting in the waiting room, imagining what part of the process he was in and how it was going. As much as I trust God that He was guiding the doctors hands, it's still hard to wait and stop thinking too much!! haha!

Just a couple days before we left for our cruise in April, Kasen had been playing outside and we noticed he had a pretty large bulge in his lower stomach. By the next day it was gone but I took him to the doctor anyway, they did an ultrasound and sure enough he had a hernia!

I was shocked that it was even possible for a toddler to have a hernia. What could he have possibly lifted that was so heavy?! But then I found out that it’s actually a pretty common issue with toddlers and it’s not caused the same way an adult hernia is caused.

Dr. Chung at Vanderbilt Pediatric Surgery explained to us that often children are born with hernias but we don’t realize it until they’re about 4 or 5 and they strain or do something to push it out. That’s all this was and since it was just fatty tissue being pushed out (not any of his intestines) we didn’t have to do emergency surgery. We were able to continue with our vacation plans and schedule the surgery when we were ready.

Anyone who has ever been to the hospital for anything knows how it is to look around and see how many people have it so much worse than you. It’s quite humbling to see all the parents in the waiting room with children there for open heart surgery, oral surgery, you name it.

Suddenly I felt a little guilty for being nervous and scared about our little conveniently planned hernia surgery! I had to remind myself that it’s okay to be worried no matter how seemingly small, he’s my baby and surgery (no matter how small or common) is serious!

After they took him back all we could do was pray and wait and pray. Those long minutes reminded me of how helpless I felt when Bryce had his seizures as a baby. Suddenly the curtain of everything we can see and touch gets pulled back and we realize how truly helpless we are. As a parent I feel like God keeps using these times to remind me how reliant I am on Him. These handsome boys are simply a gift that He’s entrusted us with, to nurture and point to Him but ultimately they’re His.

As much as I like to feel like I’m in control or keeping them safe, they’re safer in His Arms. I think of parenting as this beautiful dance with God. I get to be the "legal guardian" of His children which is why I'm realizing more and more the NEED to be in the word daily, growing in my relationship with Him.

After what seemed like forever we were able to see him and help wake him up. I asked him the question that any mom would ask after having surgery, “Did you have fun?!” lol! Much to the nurses surprise he said YES! haha! I’m pretty sure one of the last things he remembered was blowing bubbles with us in the holding area so technically he DID have fun. ;-)

We were able to take him home right away and he finally got to eat and drink. Yesterday was our first full day at home and he was playing like a crazy child, jumping around and popping balloons with his aunt and uncles. He’s doing so well that I’m trying to slow him down so he can heal!

Thank you for all the prayers and love! I know this was just a “routine surgery” but things can go wrong and we’re so grateful that he was covered in your prayers. Love you, and Kasen says thanks!! ;-)

xoxo

Deanna

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